Tuesday 31 March 2015

Care to disagree?

Anon

"There must be times when you disagree with with each other, and can't come to a compromise, how do you resolve those times?"

Compromise!!! i dont think that word is in his vocabulary, not in regards to me lol

No, thats not strictly true...well maybe, depends....

As much as i think communication is important, and it is, sometimes it feels like no matter how much we talk something through, nothing is resolved, its simply that we disagree, that our thoughts are so different, and perhaps more so that he cant understand what im getting at, and vice versa.

It reminds me of that dress that went viral a few weeks ago, some people seeing blue and black and others seeing white and gold.....thats us sometimes, we are seeing the same 'dress' but different 'colours'.

I dont consider it a big deal, nobody can agree on everything all the time, you can try very hard to see the other persons point of view, and respect it, but it doesnt change what you think.  Sure i could just agree with him, say what he wants to hear, but he doesnt like it, and he doesnt want that, but it does mean that depending on what the 'something' is one of us has to give.

And its generally me, not because i have backed down and had a sudden change of opinion or even agree with him, but because i respect his decisions, and i trust him to make ones based on what he thinks is right, for me, for us.....plus if he makes the wrong decision/choice its on him not me, ahh sometimes having so little responsibility can be a good thing!

Would i hold it against him if it was the wrong decision/choice? no i wouldnt, i might perhaps be a little "well i did try and tell you xyz" but that would be petty on my behalf, so i would settle for a look of smugness instead  :).
































14 comments:

  1. Ugh ... the dress lol. Love your answer Tori, "the look of smugness" lol. We aren't always going to agree on everything and I think trying to understand and resprcting each others view is important.

    Hugs
    Roz

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    1. thanks Roz

      Oh you have to love the look of smugness...i just dont get to do it enough lol

      x

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  2. Nicely said. Certainly there are some relationship dynamics where the sub/slave has no say at all and just has to agree. That's not for most people, tough, and I personally don't want a mindless partner. I want to have an know her views, opinions, thoughts, etc... After all, regardless of our power exchange roles, this is still a partnership and relationship. I may not go with her view, but I do at least want her input and thoughts so I can have all the info possible to make a decision.

    This I think is the key to it all...
    And its generally me, not because i have backed down and had a sudden change of opinion or even agree with him, but because i respect his decisions, and i trust him to make ones based on what he thinks is right, for me, for us

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    1. Thank you DV

      I completely agree, he wants and values my opinion, he encourages it, he wants someone that he can hold a conversation with, that is able to express themselves, not just a..yes Sir, no Sir, 3 bags full Sir kind of slave.

      x

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  3. Sometimes being able to be heard makes a huge difference, even if you know things aren't going to go your way.

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    1. Yes i think so as well, just having a voice matters, sure he can take that away if he wanted but mostly he wants to know what i think.

      x

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  4. We all have to learn from our mistakes…. coughs.. even Doms do… I think, I suppose… naaaah I am quite sure. You can agree to disagree, but at least you gave the information you needed to say. But shouldn't he be caring in the end?
    However I would get worried if a Dom wouldn't make a decision based on knowledge and listening. That would be simply foolish.

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    1. Doms make mistakes!!!!! sssshhhh we cant have that...i demand perfection from him lol

      But yes, absolutely agree, its important to listen as much as it is to voice.

      x

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  5. Oh yes.
    You reminded me of something important here :-)

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  6. Very well said!

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  7. Yeah, we're not great at compromise either, and sometimes just disagree. I do tend to be more of a "blamer" though if his way doesn't work out. I'm working on that...lol

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    1. i can be a bit of blamer, well to more accurate im guilty of.."well i remember last time....." throwing things up from years past lol

      x

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