Tuesday 26 March 2013

Opening a can of worms

Everyone has fantasies dont they? some are plain unrealistic...although im absolutley convinced i am the woman for Johnny Depp.

I have lots of fantasies, many i have been lucky enough to experience, some didnt live up to the fantasy, and then there are those that just are best left as fantasy, some are simply well ones im not comfortable in discussing here.

There are also those that are possible, but im unsure of if they make reality will i be ok with that? what would the repurcussions be if i wasnt, but it would be too late in the moment? would they impact on our relationship?

Over the years i have expressed my desire to watch the bossman having sex with another woman, i have watched another woman give him a blowjob and that didnt faze me at all, no jealousy, i was turned on by watching, but that was...crikey 3 years ago if not longer, when we did mix and play with others.   There has been no sex with others, and i have and still dont have any desire to be with another man....i have given another dominant a blowjob before with bossman watching and i didnt like it.

Yesterday i mentioned to him that this was still something i thought about a lot, i like the idea of being tied to a chair, gagged and watching him with another woman, i dont want to join in, i have engaged sexually with another woman and its not really something that holds any appeal, im bisexual coz he says i am!  anyway i just mentioned it and moved on, thinking no more of it.

Today he anounced out of the blue "better get looking then for a woman I can fuck, so you can watch" and..and i wasnt expecting that, but more so i wasnt expecting this sudden rush of jealousy especially as i have always maintained im not a jealous minded person, but being confronted with it actually happening....has brought about these emotions that are new to me...and i dont like it.

I want to put the worms back into the can and leave them there.












8 comments:

  1. tori,

    Wow. Be careful what you wish for in your fantasy. I really appreciate your thoughtful discussion of the concept of a fantasy.

    I have had many fantasies realized with terrific scenes. Last week, I had a hard scene that fulfilled a fantasy I have had for many years. I do have a few that are very extreme and I am not sure if I would go there. And, I have never revealed them either.

    I have some friends who have done everything! And, they have realized every fantasy they could imagine. I know, it is hard to believe, but I know it is true.

    Thanks for the thoughtful post. And, good luck.

    Hug,
    joey



    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks joey, being able to live out ones fantasies is amazing and i have been lucky enough to do so but there is also that need to really think through the repurcussions.

      x

      Delete
  2. Oh wow Tori, if you are jealous at the thought of it this may be really tough. Did you tell him how it made you feel? Hopefully either you can squash it or he can talk you through it.

    Most fantasies on this end revolve around extreme bdsm and humiliation, some of them are bothersome and have not been shared. It did take a while to get comfortable with the fact that a lot of fantasies don't involve actual sex acts but more pain and control. With time we have gotten better just accepting that's how one is wired.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hi ya db

      i explained more in the post following this, we always talk about issues.

      gosh yes a lot of my fantasies are humiliation based.

      x

      Delete
  3. then take it back. there's no point forcing yourself to go thru with something now is there?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol i have explained more in the post next..which you already read...i do have this tendencey to get off on having to do things i dont want to...its difficult to explain.

      x

      Delete
  4. I have the same fantasy of being tied up and watching-that part seems to be for the humiliation factor. Master said he will do it someday.

    I don't mind watching him have sex with someone else (have already done), the part that bothers me is "get looking for the woman for me" cause I think he should do that part himself (and here I'm talking about me and my Master, not what yours should do). It's not like I'm running down to the store to buy him a shirt that I think will fit, this is another person we're talking about. Well, anyway, hope I haven't said too much...

    ReplyDelete
  5. ancilla please dont think you can ever say too much, i like getting different perspectives.

    Now see i get what your saying about how it bothers you looking for the woman for him..but my view is i would rather do that...because well im fussy and i want as much input as possible..plus i must like her lol

    x

    ReplyDelete