Tuesday 14 August 2007

the proverbial doormat!...sometimes

I sometimes have a difficult time distinguishing between what i want and what i need, we spoke briefly last night and this subject came about, albeit in a different context and i spent the rest of the evening thinking about this. It seems reasonable to say that as a slave i shouldnt have wants, so i will change this to what i would like and of course there are things i would like to try but does not mean i will necessarily enjoy it. Humiliation is something i definitley would like to explore more of and more so degredation, to me its the stripping away of the ego, taking away basic human rights, enforcing stricter protocol for a set period of time. This i think i would prefer when faced with something i may find particular difficult because if im in a state of mind where i am treated as an object then i can easily adjust and cope with what is happening.

Although it is not up to me i have thought about how i would prefer things to be, when it so happens that we meet another couple, He mentioned a while back that He may decide that i would be bound and blindfolded, at first i wasnt keen on this i didnt like the idea that i would be objectified, but now its most definitley what i would prefer. The appeal is in the objectification itself, just being used soley for whatever He decides, i would prefer not to have to speak unless necessary, in this situation i would prefer to be the proverbial doormat for as long as any activities are happening and until they have gone.

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