Wednesday, 29 August 2007

for my Master

am feeling low, after talking with You this evening and it was not resolved so its left until the morning to discuss, and i hate leaving issues overnight i just dwell on it and question my position. I find it difficult to maintain a submissive attitude when i disagree with You and this is something that causes me concern as i think i should think more carefully how i express myself when confronted with a disagreement and also i question is it right for me to disagree. Im inclined to say yes as otherwise i think there would be a breakdown of communication between us its important to me that i am able to state if im unhappy about something and then the problem can hopefully be resolved.

I think mostly its when i take or read things the wrong way especially when its an issue that im really sensitive about, You said You was dissapointed with me for what i had wrote in the email and that upset me for obvious reasons and i then feel guilty that i have expressed how i feel, its very easy to misinterpret the written word and i think this is exactly what has happened in this case and maybe i have blown it out of proportion.

what i do find hurtful however is that You implied i do not trust You and this i felt was inappropriate as i trust You 100% , no matter what pain you may choose to inflict on me or to whomever You choose to use me it does not change how i feel about You as i trust You and im sorry if i gave any indication otherwise but never doubt my trust in You.

i love You
Your slave tori

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