Toasted

Because im such a dumbo at times, as those that know me say, academically great, common sense....what common sense! i would be offended if it wasnt for the fact that im inclined to agree with them.

It all started very innocently (as these things do!) on Monday morning when i went to the local bakery, they had made this new bread, sounded rather yummy, a rye bread with cranberries and oranges,  picked up a loaf thinking that will be nice for lunch, toasted.

Finished up other bits of shopping, headed home, set about getting lunch sorted, and....the bread is a large loaf, the slices wont fit in the toaster.....i will not be beaten...not by a loaf of bread anyway, so on a mission, armed with a ruler...yes i am that anal, i head back into town...to buy a new toaster.....i know, exciting life i lead.

Well, a challenge indeed, the majority of toasters are standard slot size, im pretty sure people were looking at me thinking im a nut job as i went around measuring toasters, but i actually found one in an independent store, and snapped it up, ok, a bit pricey for a toaster....but priorities...my slice of bread would fit in it!

So, get home, and toast my bread, which as it turns out is not very nice at all toasted, better just as bread, but never mind, got a shiny new toaster, and i get greeted with...

"Why have we got a new toaster?"....really! what man notices these sorts of things....ok so it is quite a large size and in bright yellow (there was no other colour...hmm perhaps i could redecorate the kitchen around the toaster colour?)  ah but i have been banned from decorating for 6 months!..so unreasonable.

So i relay what happened, the look on the face, can only be translated as utter bewilderment or perhaps 'crazy bitch'...i think i shall go with bewilderment.

"I see, so it didnt occur to you to cut the slice in accordingly, or perhaps use the grill in the oven?"

"ummmmm.....nope.... duh! but

we have a new toaster!"

goes off shaking his head.