My 10yr old daughter came home from school a few months ago and announced that she knew how babies were made and matter of factly stated "its when the boy puts his willy in the girls mouth" so i asked her where she had got this information from and it was from the new girl in her class. I told her that this was wrong information and gave her the facts, explaining exactly what went where to which she was quite mortified and stated that she thought what she had been told sounded better!..did have to stiffle a laugh at that point. I did reply however that maybe it did sound better but it was not how babies were made and she was quite satisfied with that answer and off she went to play.
Now im a firm believer in replying to childrens questions as honestly as possible and dependent on their age will determine to how simple and basic or not i keep the answers, i would rather my children have the facts than playground fiction. Its very difficult these days to shield children from sex and sexuality, they are more exposed to it than i was as a child, when i was 10 and reading girls magazines they were about pop stars etc, a magazine my daughter likes to read which is aimed at 8-12 year olds had an article in it last month about how to apply make-up.
I realise times are different now, but as a parent ideally i want my children to be children for as long as possible but its like fighting a losing battle and im drastically out numbered by the media, internet, friends etc, however ultimatley i have the responsibility to monitor what my children are exposed to which is easier the younger they are, its a lot less easier the older they get.
My son asked a few weeks ago if i would buy him some condoms, it took me completley by surprise but i held it together and we discussed it, every part of me wanted to say no and pull the 'your under age' card which he is at 15, i wanted to tell him as his mother that there was no way i was going to allow this and i wanted to let rip...but i didnt....it wouldnt have helped.
I am pleased that he felt comfortable enough to come to me and talk about it, we discussed it calmly, i told him all my concerns, him and his girlfriend are both young and although their bodies may be matured, mentally they are still children, i told him that they are both under age and they have plenty of time to discover sex, i told him of all the risks.
Ultimatley my son and his girlfriend are going to do what they want and they have made their minds up, i could have ranted and raved but it would have been pointless, im pleased that he talked to me about it and relieved that they are sensible enough to use contraception. Do i agree with them, and think its ok? not at all, later after we had finished speaking i went to my bedroom and cried, i do think he is too young both of them are, i do worry about the possible consequences, i am worried about the emotional impact on them both, im his mum i want to protect and shield him from potential hurt, i want him to be a child, he is a child no matter how grown up he thinks he is at this very moment he is in his room playing his Playstation for goodness sake.
Being a parent is one of the most rewarding things in the world but its also the most worrying and scariest thing.