Monday, 23 April 2012

The buck stops here

I think as much as i at times struggle with this mindfield of submission i dont take much time to consider that its not always a walk in the park for dominants either, in some ways perhaps for them its a different mindfield, different challenges, they are after all the ones taking responsibility of being in control, making the decisions...and in some dynamics as it is with mine....the buck stops with them.....thats a hell of a lot of responsibilty to shoulder.
Sure for us thats the way we like and prefer it, he is a man that likes to be in control not just within our relationship but pretty much all aspects of his life, he likes order and structure, he knows what he wants and when he sets his mind to something he gives it his all....yes ok the man is very what i actually mean is he is very confident, focused and determined.

So because he is this way i tend to take his dominance for granted, i have this expectation that he will always make everything ok, for the most part i am obedient and i do make an effort to make life easier for him, when i do have my wobbly moments i look to him to fix it and put me back on the right track and he does each and every time.  I can get very needy at times...but you know i think he doesnt mind that, i think he likes the fact that i am to a certain degree dependent on his dominance..i wander if thats to do with the being in control element? it would seem likely so.

But taking all this into consideration, its a lot to put on a person, and although dominants may well choose and prefer this course it cant always be plain sailing for them, i certainly couldnt and wouldnt want the inclined to think that for all the moaning and difficulties i go through i have the easy bit which comes as a bit of a realisation because i have always been convinced that dominants have it the easiest as its nearly always their way.


  1. You/re right but the strong Dom types (by strong mouse means the kinds that are naturally controlling all the time) don't seem to mind at all the burden they shoulder....

    In fact mouse would say it's a not burden to them most of the time. They're probably grateful...because to some degree or another they're happiest when they are in control. When things just run smoothly. Of course, when things do go wrong they need help like anyone else does...but hopefully those times are short-lived.

    Our struggles, it seems are inherent to what we are expected today by society. We're not expected to submit in anything...And maybe that's where our inner conflicts are started...

    It does seem tho, we struggle more with submission than they do with their dominance.


  2. I agree with mouse. My Master is naturally controlling all the time and actually chuckles when I ponder out loud if I am putting too much burden on him.

    I think is makes sense for Dominants to like our dependence on the control, it is a true sign of power.

  3. Just recently I had a conversation with Daddy that went like this...

    me~"Daddy, do you like controlling me?"

    Daddy~after laughing good naturedly, clearly pleased about the thought, "I love to control you. You're not a burden, not at all."

    When Daddy said that I felt so loved and cared for, secure. It made me so happy that he values my submission to him.


  4. hi ya mouse

    i have fleetingly thought that whats expected in todays society is a contributing factor to why its such a struggle.

    I suppose if its looked at in that way then it wouldnt be much of a struggle for dominants because its acceptable to be assertive....oh something else to ponder lol

    tori xx

  5. hi dancingbarez

    Yes dependencey on them is a sign of power but as that famous quote goes...with power comes great responsibility....and there is that fine line of not letting the power go to their heads.

    tori x

  6. hi ya kitty

    i agree i do feel very secure knowing that he is in control, its comforting and its safe.

    tori xx