Exploring s/m is endless i think, i have learnt and am still learning that there are so many different and various possibilities out there to inflict pain, to torment and tease somethings still shock and and leave me with that jaw dropping expression....much to his amusement. He uses my curiosity to his advantage i am terribly curious and when an image or a suggestion is 'fed' to me its like a seed being planted in my head and slowly with a lot of 'nourishment' it grows and i have to pick it...i have to experience what has made me so curious...this can take weeks, months or longer but eventually i will say "i would like to try xyz".....and he has got me exactly where he wanted me.
He gave me a video to watch perhaps a year ago maybe longer, i dont have to watch them but you know curiosity and all that so i watched it of course and it was hard bdsm and there was a scene of a women tied with her back to a cross no big deal there. Oh then the dominant picked up these thin rods (which were it turns out skewers!) perhaps 7/8 inches in length and i couldnt think for the life of me what they was for..then he grabbed one of her breasts and slowly pushed one of the rods through it....omg right throught the bloody tit!...yes it was one of those jaw dropping moments...no way thats just..well seriously people do that...it was a bit like those times when you dont want to watch but you just have to because you cant quite believe what your watching...so the seed was planted.
I put it to one side adamant that this way beyond what i wanted to experience and ignored the tell tale throbbing between my legs because it was far too much for me to comprehend. He asked if i had watched it and i said that i had and that it didnt interest me or arouse me (yes i lied..i know shocker) he just grinned in that way..you know as if to say i know your lying but i will let this one go.
So i had to watch it again of course just to confirm that it didnt interest me, i still felt the same..i did really, and i had to buy some of these skewers just to see what they actually looked like..nothing more..honestly. He has on odd occasions asked me about them and we have discussed it, no pressure just little reminders to keep me fed.
So i have them, they havent been used yet they are here hidden away, taunting me, and i know he is waiting and he wont have to wait much longer because i need to know, i need to know what it will be like.. and i will ask.
Edited to add....truthfully im not sure i really want to try it..it terrifies me but i just cant get it out my head.