Tuesday, 24 July 2012

Slowly, slowly catches monkey

One of the most important characteristics and weapon (yes really) a dominant can have is patience, to let the submissive come to him rather than pushing for compliance or to insist she will do a specific act knowing that she will most likely comply because she wants to please him.

Practising being patient requires the dominant to know his submissive and the most effective way he can know his submissive is through communication, listening to her, talking to her, understanding her trains of thought, what triggers turn her on..and off.  Taking notice of how she responds to what you say, does it excite, intrigue or scare her?  The difference between saying something in general conversation to having her tied up and whispering in her ear what you would like to do to her..asking would she like that? if she says yes having the patience to not do it...to leave her wanting it....the subtle differences in how and when something is suggested can have different results.

It is similar to planting a seed, having the patience to wait for that seed to grow and to eventually bloom, it cant be rushed, of course you could always just go out and buy the plant but isnt it more satisfying knowing you have cultivated it yourself?  The same applies to a dominant being patient, he could use force to get the submissive to do as he wants and sure there are times when that is hot in its own right, but there are times its more satisfying to see the submissive grow and flourish and to ask to be pushed because she is ready and wants to be.

Now patience as a weapon.  A submissive needs and desires to please her dominant, she is often her own worst enemy and critic wanting to do all of the myraid of things her dominant enjoys but yet with somethings there is that uncertainty and reluctance .

Im very much at the point that wanting to please him over-rides my discomfort of things and im going to make the bold statement of saying that he knows i will do whatever he wants, so he uses this to his advantage.  He plants the seed in my head, and patiently sits back and waits for it to grow.....like me submitting to a woman for example, i know this would please him as he has said as much he also knows im reluctant to..but i want to please him, so slowly im coming around, im thinking about it, i talk myself out of it.  He says nothing, he doesnt need to say or do anything but patiently wait for me to take the bait, to let my curiosity grow and i will ask to do it because it pleases him.

Of course he doesnt need to be patient, he could set it up and i will obey but sometimes playing the game of patience is more rewarding in the long term.  I think there are a lot of factors that have got me where i am now, natural growth, being pushed but i think his patience plays a large part, waiting and watching me bloom under his guidence.

11 comments:

  1. As one of my friends commented the other day, "the Masochist begged 'hurt me please' and the Sadist replied 'not yet.' " Waiting for the right moment makes everything more delicious. Thank you for reminding us.

    Stay SINful
    Mr. AP

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ah yes i have heard that phrase before lol and its tormenting but oh so worth the wait.

      Delete
  2. Ah. But when does the action start? A woman of a patient man is wondering.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol kitty when the submissive asks or even better begs, personally my Master loves to see me begging desperately for what i want more so when its something i dont like lol

      x

      Delete
  3. i think what is pleasing to them is seeing us ask, request, beg, even... but in a manner where we also show that we are aware it is up to them to make the choice.

    thanks for the post.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. yep thats exactly it, i think rather than seeing it as topping from the bottom because your asking its more pleasing for them to see the sub in that need of wanting something and they have the power to give or to deny.

      Delete
    2. uh huh. mean and evil. LOL. I say that to BIKSS all the time. that's he's an evil evil man. He usually raises an eyebrow at me. Or grins. depending on where we happen to be and what we're doing when I say it.

      Delete
  4. Great post! I love the idea of planting seeds.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hi Renee Rose

      Thankyou very much.

      Delete
  5. Hah.. I call my Owner Evilman. That is my name for him. The funny thing is, I wouldn't have him any other way.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lol great name for him..nope i wouldnt have mine any other way either.

      x

      Delete