Since reading mouse's post http://aslavestale.blogspot.co.uk/2012/05/sweetest-hmm-pet-in-world.html i have been pondering over subjugation, i had heard of the word but couldnt give an explanation for what it meant so i had to google it and taken from the Oxford English dictionary: to bring under control or domination, especially by conquest, to make someone subordinate to.....
To be honest on reading this definition my first thoughts were along the lines of being similar to a wild animal that needs taming, to be broken in, which hmm could fit with being submissive and being controlled and dominated and the struggle it can be at times. Then i pondered the element of being conquered, should i need to be conquered? if he has to make me subordinate and submit that brings me to ask more questions.... but its much more than that which has led me to really thinking about it and trying to get a better sense of the term and its relation to M/s if it fits, i suppose ultimatley its dependent on whether it fits for you.
What i could relate to is mouse's comment of
"These feelings of being, for lack of a better term, subjugated or made to submit was where mouse really got off. It's important to say, mouse trusts him so thoroughly and deep down knows he'd never do anything to diminish that. Feeling free while bound -- the freedom of the ropes, being bereft of choice and of voice is just bliss."
In particular its the phrasing of being made to submit that i have questioned myself because one thing i do get off on (to use mouses's term which is just so apt) is being made to do something i dont like or i dont want to do and i have struggled with this because surely if im submissive i shouldnt have to be made to submit? I think perhaps when saying "being made to" it conjures up images of possible brutal physical force being used, against ones consent, which could give negative connatations.
When i say "being made to submit" its more about not having a choice in the matter which is what turns me on a lot rather than it becoming a confrontational stand off each and every time although there have been a few of them over the years but on those occassions the end result has been that i have eventually submitted to whatever caused the confrontation....it may mean he has to rethink how he has gone about it and perhaps take more time in adjusting me to whatever i was resisting but nevertheless ultimatley he does get the end result he wanted, i dont get let off the hook...he i guess yes conquers.
It doesnt need to be something really heavy, for example i dont like having to lick his cum when he has cum (i have no objections to drinking straight from the source) but if i have wanked him off i dont like cleaning it up afterwards (the man eats too many currys!). However although i dont like the actual act i am turned on by the fact that i have to do it when instructed to..i have no choice. Of course there are other areas which are more heavy but the feelings of lack of choice are the same regardless of the act itself. I find it comforting and it gives me security that these choices are taken away from me, it emphasis my status a status that im happy with..submitting to his will.
So as i have been having all these thoughts swirling around i can see how subjugation is an apt description, it implies lack of choice physically and verbally which is what i, we like in our relationship.
I can understand how perhaps to some this could be seen as going against my consent, most especially in the context of having to do things i dont like or dont want to do, but that leads to the murky waters of consensual non consent which i have my opinions on but im not going there, it needs to be assummed that i am in a healthy M/s dynamic and i am.
Thanks to mouse for giving these me ideas/thoughts and being able to make a little bit more sense of them.