Thursday, 10 January 2013
You want to control what!!!!
Being controlled/dominated takes many forms, whether it be strictly bedroom only, or everywhere, down to what you wear, what you eat, what you buy, where you go, who you see, it may be bits of both, whatever is agreed upon as the relationship progresses....it really could be limitless.
Consensual slavery doesnt sit too well with some people, to be fair i think this is because its not understood, we all have our own ideas of what it means, for me a part of it means "whatever is agreed upon" does not apply here, there is no negotiations on what i will or wont submit to, what i will let him control and what i wont.
A "im going out with friends next weekend" could well become a "may i go out with friends next weekend?", seeing a dress in a shop window and going in and buying it without thought could become something that one no longer does without permission, it could be any number of little things that are usually taken for granted.
It might mean not being able to sit on furniture without permission, not being able to just have that glass of wine you really feel like after a shitty day at work (that one should really be a hard limit!), not wearing a type or a style of clothing that you like, it may mean some or all or none of these things.
These 'things' are not essential to consensual slavery, they may apply to some and not to others, they are not what i would consider exciting or 'hot' compared to say being controlled in a sexual manner or sessions of s/m, tpe (total power exchange) however is not just sex and s/m, but nevertheless these 'things' can be a turn-on, simply because its the knowledge that one is not in control of these basic 'things'. Knowing that im under his authority and he is in control not just turns me on but gives me peace of mind, security and structure....i know what im allowed/whats acceptable behaviour and what im not and what isnt.
After a while it all becomes the norm, what others might see as ott, i just accept as this is the way it is and shrug it off, sometimes not, sometimes something might crop up that i think is unfair, unreasonable and i try to make a stand, get argumentative and stroppy (yeah well im not going to be writing a book on 'how to be a good submissive' anytime soon)....and
and he doesnt budge, not an inch, not once his mind has been made up, my 'stand' gets me nowhere, and im left frustrated, probably pissed off and you might get the odd rant about it on here when these moments occur but and this is the biggest but...
I want this control, i thrive on it and im happy because i have it.