The written word can be open to interpretation, blogging especially. I know when i write here or comment on someone elses post my intention is not to offend, sometimes inadvertantly i do, this might be because what i have said has been interpreted not the way it was intended or perhaps my sense of humour isnt understood....there has been a few occassions when this has happened and i have by default offended someone.
Im a nice person ( i am really!), im generally bubbly and happy-go-lucky, i know my faults, im stubborn, terribly sarcastic and not the most forgiving of people if crossed, but fiercely protective of those i care about...i get on well with most people.
Honestly i feel like i have been here before, i swear i have!
I know this lifestyle, or more specifically the relationship i have with my Bossman isnt for everyone, sometimes it feels lonely because im not sure that many 'get' the sort of dynamic we have, the Bossman has his fair share of critics as well, he has been called abusive and accused of being a predator....obviously im the 'victim'...being as i have been brainwashed though i dont see that!
I cant even bring myself to go into detail of whats brought all this about, but im tired of it, i shouldnt need to defend myself, the Bossman, or our relationship, i wont it would be pointless..people will make up their own minds, i respect that.
We are who we are, and it is what it is.
Hugs! I get the same thing a lot and I don't ever try to judge or say negative things.
ReplyDeletePer your earlier question, Wolf and I have been overwhelmed with separate work and personal commitments - ugh! But we are making it through .... :-)
love, squirrel
I usually shrug it off but on this occassion it got to me.
DeleteGlad to hear your making it through, its difficult when life is so busy, honestly sometimes i feel like me and the Bossman are ships that pass in the night!
x
I believe your nice...I really do =)
ReplyDeleteYou know it's tricky when others don't understand.
hugs,
~fiona
Thankyou fiona, it is tricky when people dont understand, and if im truthful i cant say i understand different relationships i come accross.
Deletex
(((hugs))) sweetie, I think you're a very sweet person, and I'm pleased to call you friend. I feel this way often. We're not really kinky enough for kinky folk, and we're a little kinkier than most DD folk, and I call him Daddy.
ReplyDeleteIt doesn't really matter what anyone thinks. He sees you, and you see him. You know what the other needs, and do what you can to feel each other. Reciprocity. All anyone should care about is that you fulfill each other - who cares if they'd do it the same way or not.
Thanks June, its appreciated.
DeleteThe rational part of me absolutley agrees it doesnt matter what anyone thinks, but perhaps i was feeling particularly vunerable and it got to me.
x
I am from a completely vanilla life...and even I get your relation ship is not abusive. I think u are just dealing with assholes. Sorry u have to deal w/ that crap... :(
ReplyDeleteThanks, yes assholes would be an apt description lol, really i should know better than to get myself upset about it!
Deletex
I love your blog and comments. I get your relationship with Bossman, but it is not for everyone.
ReplyDeleteYou do not have to defend your life style. Be who you are.
Hug,
joey
Thanks joey,
DeleteNo it isnt for everyone, and i know its probably unrealistic to expect people to 'get' it.
x
You don't need to defend yourself and you've NEVER once offended mouse in anyway....never even an inkling of offense. You're funny, sweet and you seem very caring....
ReplyDeleteSeriously, what's not to like?
<3
thankyou mouse, i do wander if i lack tact sometimes, i have been told by friends im not very tactful at times.
DeleteI would be mortified if i thought i had offended someone, and if i did inadvertantly i would hope they would let me know..i dont like bad feelings.
sincerely, thanks
x
Honestly you are always going to offend someone... just as they are going to offend you. The difference is on your own blog there is this wonderful delete button. Don't be afraid to use it. With a bit of luck you might even manage to offend someone... deliberately :D
ReplyDeleteYou are right, i know this, and mostly i shrug it off but sometimes it gets to me, and on this occassion it did..a lot.
DeleteAhh the delete button is a wanderful tool.
x
*hugs* i don't always agree with everything i read on every blog I read, and i say what my concerns are. Cos I don't know all the details... but I think it is a bit of a duty to "say" when I feel something's not right... but if the person thinks it is not relevant to their situation, or they have it under control - they are welcome to throw out my worry-wart opinion.
ReplyDelete:)
Just as I am welcome to file away their post in my "i don't understand them" category in my brain.
but at the end of all that, it's a given that not every couple is the same. and i think if we all understand that what we say is not meant to be judging then we're all good.
i don't think you should worry too much about it. they can go fuck a spider. really.
my stand is just basically as long as you're both HAPPY doing what you're doing, that's all good.
the problems i have are with women who feel / say that they have no choice but to stay on in a relationship that doesn't fulfil them anymore cos they are afraid. now THAT is abuse.
*i am proud to call you friend, albeit only in cyber space!*
"fuck a spider".......now thats not one i have heard before but its given me a laugh... thanks
ReplyDeleteI agree, and i should know better, i say it enough myself that it doesnt matter what other people think, but sometimes Fondles it gets to me, might be me feeling over sensitive at the time, it hurts....i know i shouldnt give them the power to make me feel like it.
Yes there are relationships i dont understand, and on reflection i probably do judge (i think we all do to some degree or another) but to set out to cause someone offence, to be abusive isnt necessary.
Thankyou, i consider this (blogger) a community, it may be cyber but there are real people behind the blogs and likewise i count them as friends.
x
Meh, sometimes people just suck.
ReplyDeleteAs someone with an often misunderstood and unappreciated sense of humor lol, I am quite familiar with the disastrous turns of opinion it can lead to.
People won't always "Get" it, either the humor or the relationship. And that is generally much easier to accept in theory than when confronted with it.
I hope that whatever has upset you has faded into the background and things are going better now.
Yes people do just suck at times and i really should not let it get to me..but sometimes yeah it does and it did.
DeleteIm getting over it...im now pissed off, not upset lol
x
I think you are fine just the way you are, I find the way you put things to be very open, honest and most of all real.
ReplyDeleteI personally have found an acceptance of myself by reading your blog, I have been better able to accept and embrace my masochistic side, knowing that I am not alone.
So I thank you.
One of my affirmations is; let the naysayers say, for at the end of the day you only have you to answer to.(though easier to say then do lol)
Thankyou Anna May, thats very kind of you.
DeleteIts not easy this path we take, but so worth it.
x
Don't defend yourself or your relationship. There's nothing wrong with either one of them. The people who cause that need to defend are most likely never going to understand anyway, because they are narrow minded and judgemental. I for one, love your sense of humor :)
ReplyDeleteThanks faerie,
DeleteI suppose really expecting people to 'get it' is unrealistic, but i would rather they said nothing at all than condemn something they dont understand.
x
Dont feel bad I just had this type of thing happen to me recently. It doesnt matter what anyone else thinks, what works for you and the Bossman is what works for you both, so what if it isn't up to someone else's standards let them go suck wind. Hugs
ReplyDelete