Monday, 20 February 2012

too many answers

As much as i take our relationship seriously i believe its important to have fun, it should after all be enjoyable for both parties shouldnt it? sure there are times its difficult, a struggle...but thats life you have to take the rough with the smooth.  But where do you find that perfect balance, im all for progressing and exploring, growing not just as his slave but as a person....but is there a stop point?...should there be one? far will i go? far will he make me go?....where will it end?

I put that question to him the other day...where will it end? it was part of a discussion we was having instigated by me saying that sometimes i think he pushes me too hard and i dont like certain things and dont want to do them...his answer was "where do you want it to end"?  I cant answer that not really, i simply dont know, we have been together 5 years next month so trust is well established but it would be naive to think that means i have all the answers, i still in many ways consider myself a newbie, i put a lot of trust in his experience (his being much more vast than mine) but it would be naive also to think that he isnt capable of screwing up either and getting it wrong.

What if a decision or a choice he makes is the wrong one? how do you get past that?

Im just getting my thoughts down, but im overthinking....why cant i just let go and enjoy the moment?

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