Tuesday, 9 October 2007

the surprise!!! not a good one

We lazed in bed for a while well not just lazing, i knew Master had something planned and he wouldnt tell me anything and i was getting frustrated as im not really a fan of surprises.   I had lots of different ideas running through my head and noted what bits and pieces he was taking with him, when i realised he was taking a damn lot, i became suspicious as i thought that meant it had to be somewhere really private ie. indoors so i deduced that it was likely someones home.

We stopped off for breakfast and after getting back in the car thats when curiosity started to get the better of me and i began asking questions, he was relatively patient at first and then i think i must have started to annoy him because he said if i asked anymore i would get 10 lashes of the whip so that shut me up well for a while. i realised that as it was a relatively long journey i concluded that we must be going to someone and i became sure that it was to ******'s place and i made the mistake of asking a question to try and confirm my suspicions and all i got in reply was the promise of the whip later..shit!! when will i learn to shut my mouth.

However my suspicions was confirmed when Master blindfolded me after a while, i admit i was nervous and slightly pissed off, i had just had my first time playing with a couple the night before, and he was putting me through it again! so when the car parked up and i was led into the house i wasnt in the best frame of minds to begin with. I hate surprises....even if there good ones, i dont like it.

I did find it amusing at the pretence of inventing an imaginary dom when i knew it was going to be ***** and when i was put on to my knees between her legs i knew what was expected so no surprises there. I recall ****** asking me if i knew where i was and i just said "hello *****", when the blindfolded was removed i sat down and i was aware of how nervous i really was and quite uneasy i didnt know what was expected of me and i wasnt prepared for the situation.

We chatted for a while and then i was led into the bedroom and secured standing in a legs and arms spread position, not quite suspended as feet were on a plank of wood, at this point i had calmed a little so wasnt scared, nervous yes. Master and ****** started lightly hitting me with canes and it wasnt very painful and at first i was enjoying it, i cant exactly pinpoint when it started going wrong but i just got this intense need to be left alone and for it to stop and i remember swearing at Master and begging him to stop.

I wasnt just scared i was terrified and panicking, Master called a halt to it, he was trying to calm me down but i just wanted out and away from all of them, but most of all at that point i didnt feel safe.

We then all went back into the lounge and i was on the sofa cuddled up to Master and i was so tired mentally as well as physically i remember clinging onto him because i was still scared and i didnt want to be put through any more with anyone else, i havent ever felt as vunerable as i did at that moment.

Master and ****** talked for a while and i was struggling to stay awake i cant recall exact sequence of events but i recall Master instructing me onto my hands and knees for a flogging and that was really great and i  did get an orgasm from it and i was beginning to relax. Then i was put between *****'s legs again whilst being flogged and it actually made it more bearable and i was asking for more and harder and came twice, i found the pain reassuring and therefore i was more at ease. ****** asked me if i really wanted to ride the pony and i looked to Master for an instruction on whether he wanted me to or not, i didnt want to but if he had wanted me to then i would have obviously but he said it was up to me so i declined....besides rode the wooden pony the previous night.

At one point i was lying on the floor i think it was not long after the flogging and ****** challenging me if i could stay quiet until spoken to which i didnt think would be a problem, Master left the room and i was doing fine until i heard the whip which he obviously had gone to get and i swore before i even saw it (god the sound of it is enough to get a reaction) and when he came into the room with it i instinctively started protesting and moving away.

He tricked me and i walked right into it. ***** (bitch) was instructed to beat me with the cane and i wasnt exactly thrilled at this prospect although i suspect she was, i felt very concious of the fact it was 3 on 1 and i felt like i was being bullied with no way of defending myself together.

I didnt like that her dom was dictating the caning, he said to her "harder" after each stroke, and it was too much, i couldnt handle it, and i safe worded, and i was mad, so angry that instead of recognising that me safe wording was a cry for help, Master had me take a few more, i resent him for that...i was being pushed too much, too fast.

A little while later Master used the whip on me lightly and it was nice, very nice and i started to see it in a different light and realised it can be very enjoyable and not just an implement of nasty pain.

All in all i learnt a lot from the whole experience i think we both did in different ways,  Master and i talked obviously about how it went and he apologised as in hindsight i wasnt ready, it was as i said just too much for me all to handle in a short time, although this is something that we can learn from

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