We have never argued the bossman and i, not as in full scale screaming shouting arguments, not because we are this perfectly harmonious couple, but because you cant row and argue with someone who wont retaliate.
And he doesnt, he has never shouted at me, raised his voice and emphasised tone yes, but nope he has never shouted, he wont engage me in arguing....and sometimes its absolutley infuriating when one person is giving it 'beans' and the other is just calmly taking it without comment or action (for the time the ranting is going on).
We disagree on many of a subject, this is certainly not a relationship where its a case of "if Master says it is right, it is right' not in the context of having opinions about life in general, and as much as i put him on a pedestal...it doesnt make his views, opinions anymore valid than mine.
When i wrote that last post, i wasnt being brave lol, i was totally pissed off with him (still am a little) and this is my little corner of the world, where within reason he wont hold me accountable for my rants.....because ranting at him directly is pointless so i need to let off steam somewhere!
and i hate that....when im mad at him but i have calmed down from the ranting..all it takes is him saying "good girl" and whatever i was mad at him for fades into the background, it doesnt matter...because i just want to be that "good girl".
ahhh the good girl symdrome, its one many of us suffer. :)
ReplyDeleteL x
It is yes! and to think years ago i would have found it patronising, now i crave it.
Deletex
I completely understand! When I'm amped up I need him to engage in the bickering. Nope, calm and cool. Which just gets me mad.
ReplyDeleteOh chickadee thats it, you get it!
Deletei want some retaliation at the time, in hindsight though i am glad he is calm and in control but thats just not what i want in those moments...blimey no wander men complain they dont get us lol
x
Yeah .. how do they do that? Remain rational, even in the face of your rage & rants? I did that a couple of times with my former Dom & not only did he remain calm throughout .. he talked me down too. I have never had that happen in any vanilla relationship. It's both maddening & reassuring all at the same time!!!!
ReplyDeleteWTF! ;)
(((hugs)))
lk
Yes maddening and reassuring sums it up perfectly, i love that he is calm and in control but i also want some retaliation...which i wont get.....well not at that time lol
DeleteIts later when he exacts his retribution!
x
Its good that one person remains calm as infuriating as it is when you are not the calm person. Nothing ever gets solved with two people yelling. Its not an easy thing to get used to though. God luck.
ReplyDeletehi db
Deleteit is good yes i agree, nothing is really every solved when 2 people are screaming and shouting at one another..so for sure im glad he is the more rational and calm one out of us...but its still infuriating lol
x
Daddy does that to me! It's so infuriating! It's great that you have this place to let off steam.
ReplyDeleteAh...the quest to be his good girl! It gets us every time!
hugs
p
It is infuriating..winds me right up at the time lol
DeleteI do try to be the good girl he wants and prefers..its makes him happy, and im happy..but sometimes i fail miserably.
x
He doesn't call me a good girl very often but he does pat me on the head a lot. I used to hate it when he did it but now I love it.
ReplyDeletehugs, Saturn
btw: thanks for the link with the canes :)
I dont get called it very often either, which makes it all the more important and meaningful when he does....i think its interesting how things which we may have seen as patronising can be turned into something we deem as affectionate.
Deleteyour very welcome
x
tori,
ReplyDeleteI had a Brit boss who was always calm even when I was pissed. At home, LD is the equivalent of Mt Etna on a bad day with lots of steam.
I hope you are back to being his good girl soon.
Hug,
joey
I think the British do have this reputation of being stoic in their emotions, i was brought up in an environment where showing ones emotions wasnt encouraged....but growing into adulthood well now im probably too much the other way lol
DeleteIm getting there i think joey lol
x
"whatever i was mad at him for fades into the background, it doesnt matter...because i just want to be that "good girl"."
ReplyDeleteThat sums it up. To be his 'good girl.'
Hope all the frustration did fade away. :)
Yeah its what i strive for.
DeleteIts all good now...just sexually frustrated now as im on orgasm denial lol
x
oh, that gets me, too tori! I want to be righteously indignant, and then he gives me the 'good girl' and all the schnoots and madness goes on at myself in my head. And I do what he wants, cause, yes, I WANT to be that good girl - sigh.
ReplyDelete<3
cd
yeah righteously indignant....thats me! lol and im so sure of myself and oh gosh almost cocky with it.....but hmm i do so want to be that good girl.
Deletex
there is certainly something about those two little words good girl isnt there :)
ReplyDeletethere is indeed....it just makes me feel good
Deletex
yeah, good girl is magic to me, too...
ReplyDeleteit certainly creates a more harmonious atmosphere and makes me want to be the good girl he knows i can be.
Deletex