It had escaped my notice that there has been controversy recently over an article on CDD which has caused some ripples within the blogger community, some choosing for their blog to go private. I only came accross this when reading Ward and June's blog and reading said article myself.
We dont practice CDD although discipline plays a part in our relationship, its more from an M/s structure which is different to how i percieve CDD, but it does bring about the issue of privacy and protecting ones self.
What i found uncomfortable about the article was the links it provided to blogs, if i was to come accross my blog in a link on an article slamming the lifestyle i lead then the first thing i would do would be to take my blog down.
The link to article i read
http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2013/06/19/spanking-for-jesus-inside-the-unholy-world-of-christian-domestic-discipline.html
In my opinion this is not in any way because im ashamed of the way i live and nor do i think its allowing the media to 'win' its simply about being sensible and keeping safe, the risk of being 'outed' is very small (i would hope) but i also couldnt handle any potential backlash of attracting unwanted attention...and my Master wouldnt want me exposed to that either.
I think there needs to be sense of realism that ttwd in whatever form it may take ie whether it be DD or M/s based, they are generally not lifestyles that are understood from the eyes of those not living it, its also i think realistic to say that abuse does occur within these dynamics also..as it does in any relationship form..vanilla or otherwise....im not suggesting that this makes it ok or acceptable for ttwd to be slammed, its not.
Its conflicting because yes as a community i think its important to stand together, but its also knowing when to pick ones battles wisely, when the media decides to get its claws into something they can be brutal, what once they raved about, because it was 'fashionable' (think 50 shades) they can turn on just as quickly...
Soon they will get bored and they will move onto the next trend etc, but if the spotlight was on M/s or s/m and it was being slammed and they were linking to blogs..of which there may be a risk i could be one of them..you can be damn sure my priority would be protecting myself and avoiding the risk of the ripple effect where those closest to me could be affected.
It might be seen as cowardly, or seen as letting them win....i see it as safeguarding until one knows the lay of the land, i wont put my or those closest to me privacy at risk.
Its not cowardly its sensible and if so the same thing. Its awful what is happening and how its affecting our community. But as you say it will pass. Let's hope soon.
ReplyDeleteYes i agree.
DeleteIt will pass but in the meantimes its sad to see how much distress its causing within the blogging community, albeit though it doesnt effect me directly, i feel very sorry for those it is.
x
It is not cowardly at all tori. I find the people who engage in this type of bashing despicable. And, most of the time they are hypocrites.
ReplyDeleteThis attack is awful.
Hug,
joey
Yes joey..hypocrites is right on target..that they are indeed.
DeleteIt is awful and i feel sorry for those directly involved.
x
I completely understand why some are going private or removing their blogs all together. It makes me angry that there is a reason (the article) for them to do it. But the truth is, these blogs are so helpful for so many. I hope that those who have gone private will feel comfortable enough to come back when the dust settle. And if you ever go private I would surely appreciate an invite :)
ReplyDeleteI understand completely, its very distressing to think potentially ones privacy may be at risk when so many have families...its the bigger picture that needs to be considered.
DeleteHopefully i will not be put in a situation that i need to go private but if i did..yep you for sure would get an invite.
x
well said. choosing your battles wisely is a lesson i have taken a long time to learn.
ReplyDeletei think i've finally gotten the hang of it. LOL
*hugs*
lol im still learning to do it..mostly when dealing with my children!
Deletex
*posting on behalf of mouse at ThePowerExchange* (limited internet coverage at the moment)
ReplyDelete"Daddy learned of the article before it began making the rounds. We have nothing against people who practice CDD in their lives -- most of those people really wouldn't be reading our blog anyway. That said if mouse's words were twisted up by someone who didn't even bother to read our blog, certainly mouse would feel hurt and betrayed. Add to that negative and hurtful comments from people who simply want to "fan the flames" is unacceptable. What totally upset mouse that one of the links was to a blog that doesn't have a CDD slant at all. In fact, mouse has never seen a mention of religion at all. It's disingenuous.
We do not blame anyone from taking their blog private and hope they return when things quiet down. Should they decide not to return, we wish them well."
Hugs,
mouse
hi mouse
DeleteIts distressing for those directly involved, its despicable that the article was so inaccurate, and painted a picture that was very one-sided..but it is sleazy media!
I hope when it quitens down things can resume to normal..and people feel more comfortable.
x
I had only just became aware of the furor yesterday on following a link or two. I read the article but in honesty just ignored it. It's a battle of sensation really. One expert says abuse, another says healthy. A girl knows if it's abuse and she doesn't consent. There ARE 50 shades of grey and CDD is just one of them.
ReplyDeleteIt is sad that some people have felt persecuted so as to bring their blogs down. THAT is the injustice. I remember someone saying something about freedom of speech once...and lifestyle (non abusive and non criminal of course). You are right thouh Tori..one must protect oneself and ones family.
L
I missed i think because its not circles that im in if that makes sense, im just so annoyed and upset for those that have been directly involved..to have their life ripped to shred in a completley misrepresented article.
DeleteBut yes ultimately one has to do whatever is necessary to protect oneself and family.
x
I also just stumbled across all the nonsense yesterday. And like you, i have children and our two professional lives that i would choose to protect if i felt a real threat - and in fact i have gone private temporarily when i felt my son getting too close. The article itself is pure hype and cheap sensation.
ReplyDeleteIt will die down, but in the meantime its stirring up a hornets nest and its sad to see the effect its having around bloggerland.
DeleteThe article was i agree hype and yes cheap sensation...with not really any positive slant.
x